Franklin Pierce Adams
The trouble with this country is that there are too many politicians who believe, with a conviction based on experience, that you can fool all of the people all of the time.
Years ago we discovered the exact point, the dead center of middle age. It occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net.
I find that a great part of the information I have was acquired by looking up something and finding something else on the way.
I hate the pollyanna pest who says that all is for the best.
The best part of the fiction in many novels is the notice that the characters are purely imaginary.
There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.
To err is human; to forgive, infrequent.
When the political columnists say 'Every thinking man' they mean themselves, and when candidates appeal to 'Every intelligent voter' they mean everybody who is going to vote for them.
Elections are won by men and women chiefly because most people vote against somebody rather than for somebody.
Having imagination it takes you an hour to write a paragraph that if you were unimaginative would take you only a minute.
Health is the thing that makes you feel that now is the best time of the year.
Middle age occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net.
Ninety-two percent of the stuff told you in confidence you couldn't get anyone else to listen to.
Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory.
The best you get is an even break.
The true republic: men, their rights and nothing more; women, their rights and nothing less.
There must be a day or two in a man's life when he is the precise age for something important.
Too much truth is uncouth.
Christmas is over and Business is Business.
When a man you like switches from what he said a year ago, or 4 years ago, he is a broad-minded person who has courage enough to change his mind with changing conditions. When a man you don't like does it, he is a liar who has broken his promises.
I am easily influenced. Compared with me a weather vane is Gibraltar.
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